And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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