First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I am spending my child support on dildos
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
