Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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