I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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