Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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