Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
and you fell through a lawn chair
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
