Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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