haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
