we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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