It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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