Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
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My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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