how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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