my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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