This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
