My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
