Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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