Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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