Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
