somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
