dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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