Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
