She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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