just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
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I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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