First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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