hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
