he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
