He kissed a someone with a penis
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
