my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
