somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
i came on her dog
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
