would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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