Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Is Oprah even human
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
