I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
