You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize