i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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