i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
