We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize
