Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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