My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
21 Texts That Prove All the Magic Happens in Parking Lots
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy