What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize