So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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