Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Randomize