Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
