So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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