I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
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you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
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I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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