and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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