have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
