like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
