peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Life without a bra equals bliss.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize