whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
