Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
