she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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