at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize